It can be argued that one of the primary reasons why a person or company hires an attorney is to alleviate their "pain." They may use the words "goal," "challenge" "problem" or "issue," but their pain is whatever they are asking your assistance with.

I encourage clients to start actively looking for a prospect’s principal "pain," because when their "pain" becomes too big for them to ignore or too excruciating to handle is the time they call out for help.

Unfortunately, when a person or company is in pain, there are some common problems:

They may not be thinking too clearly and may make irrational decisions (like hiring the wrong lawyer).

They don't use the right terms to describe their pain (they ask for mediation when they really want a divorce lawyer).

They may not see what's really causing their pain (they may focus on the immediate or surface problem and not see the root cause, in which case their pain may resurface in the future).

They may use things or people to conceal the true source of their pain (they may point to the wrong person or company as the source of their pain).

Use this knowledge to increase your effectiveness:

• You must know how your prospects typically define and describe their "pain."
• You must talk about the problem using their language.
• They will feel you listened to them if you ask them a lot of questions about their problem and their pain.
• Don't waste time describing the process you will use to resolve their pain, instead focus on helping them understand your solution and results.
• You must give them a sense of hope, that things can get better and you know how to help.
• You must project confidence in your ability to help.
• You must listen to them and make them feel understood before they will listen to you.

In order to be successful, you must clearly and consistently state how you and your services can resolve your prospect’s pain.